Loz & Toz - Season 6 "The one where Toz gets Cancer"

Hello friends 🧡 I hope you are all well and enjoying the beginning of spring.  At the beginning of Thomas's journey I said spring this year would have a whole new meaning of "new beginnings" for us. I knew Christmas would suck. I knew new year would be difficult. And I knew recovery would be slow. So I put spring in my mind for when we would be taking our lives back. And so far....it appears to be going to plan!!! 🙏🏻 each day that passes sees Thomas more and more like himself. And nothing makes me happier right now than seeing my love get stronger and coming back to life.  I spoke before about how you dont realise how much you miss things until they return. And I hadn't realised just how much I was missing his physical touch. Having his arms wrapped around me, cuddling up in bed, holding hands in the car, forehead kisses from nowhere, pulling me into his chest and reassuring when im having one of many moments. Ive missed it all so much and I cant tell you how incre...

Morning All ❤️ hope everyone is good and Lady Universe has been behaving for you all. Shes been drinking cheap wine and taking out her drunken mood swings on Toz again 🙄 So the last blog left you with Thomas's trips to a&e and urgent care, and his adrenal gland appointment. In preparation for his follow-up in April, he has 3 tests to complete.  The first is the saliva test. This one is a 'try but dont worry if you cant do it' kinda thing. Its like a little vial for blood but inside it is a piece of fabric. Thomas has to chew this and soak it in saliva. The problem with that is - he has no saliva. The dry mouth is a side effect of radiotherapy damaging his saliva glands so its either thick stringy mucus, or Sahara dry 😔 Thomas keeps a bottle of water next to him at all times to lubricate his mouth but with this test he cant eat or drink for 30 mins before doing it. Its looking likely this wont be happening but he does have until end of March so maybe if he starts produ...

A very belated Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you all!! I hope you all had a great time over the festive period and that 2026 is bringing you all happiness and good health so far ❤️ So what's been crack-a-lackin since the big man rang the bell on Dec 12th? Well, as i write this, not very much in terms of anything that isn't tainted by cancer! It feels like we haven't left this house in years. And whilst that is difficult, it's also kept Thomas safe from illness. Not mixing has meant missing some special occasions and missing people in general, but this time of life has been all about making the right choices to keep Thomas safe. The last thing he needs on top of the trauma hes going through is a dose of the super Flu! So we've not seen hardly anyone. Quick visits from family to see the kids on Christmas day but it was the weirdest. Our house is usually chaos but it was subdued and calm this year. I can't wait to blast Christmas tunes next year and flap ...

I was going to do another run through of each day this week like previous weeks but I A. Forgot to take notes this week. And B Can't fucking remember what happened and when. So ill just summarise best I can.  The final countdown to treatment finishing!  I remember looking at Thomas's appointment sheet 6 weeks ago and it was 3 double-sided A4 pages, stapled together with row after row of dates and times and thinking - "this is so much" 😩 it felt like an eternity away. Treatment ending, as monumental as it is, is not the joyous occasion it should be.  The main man has got through this week like a champion given how bad things are. Hes been on his knees at times, completely defeated and hopeless but he pulls it back each time.  Hes completely reliant on his feeding tube now, even for medicine as the tablets get stuck in his throat, which is hellishly swollen and agony to swallow. I feel like all we do all day is syringe him full of something. Paracetamol at 8, 12, 4, 8...

Im disorganised today. Im still up at Dawn's crack and I know i need to get moving but motivation is evading me. Desperately need a shower and my hair is bogging but instead, I sit, as I do most mornings, drinking coffee, looking at different forums for any tips and advice I might have missed, and to see if i can get anything that might help with the healing process/pain/dry mouth/mucus/nausea 😭  I order some Xylimelts for his dry mouth. Little minty things that stick inside your lip on your gum that help stimulate saliva. They can be used when sleeping too so they go straight in ma basket. Some L-Glutamine powder. Lots of people in America use a product called Healios, but its about £60-£80 a tub to buy. A lovely lady on one of the groups lets me know that they dont get Healios in Oz either, but the main ingredient is L-Glutamine, which can help to reduce the severity of mouth sores because it aids the healing process somehow. I figure it cant help to add a spoon of it to his sal...

Monday- It feels good not having to leave early doors. Thomas isnt having chemo again this week, so hes not scheduled in for Radio until 3pm as he'd usually have hours of chemo to go through first. Not having to leave until 1pm is a small win. Thomas isnt too bad today so far. Mornings are always the worst for him so a half decent morning is a good sign for a half decent day.  Parking at NGH is shit, IDST. Despite 1 in 2 people getting cancer now, only 1 in 5000 will get a parking space at Northampton General hospital. Oncology car park consists of about 5 regular spaces, 6 disabled and 6 electric car charging bays. And yet despite big "Oncology Patients Only" signs everywhere, you often see people parking and walking off to other parts of the hospital. Even staff from other departments take up valuable spaces. (Dont worry yourselves, everyone with cancer can walk another mile because you are a lazy inconsiderate @£#&!!) I've nearly lost my shit there a few times ...